Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I can count

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I don’t buy bullshit

In the last 500 years, have there been civilizations whose cruelty matched that of Nazi Germany?

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

Why has my ex moved on so fast after years of being together with me?

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I have complete contempt for fakery

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I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

Mysterious fast radio bursts help astronomers pinpoint cosmic ‘missing’ matter - CNN

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

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I took the same Oath and took it seriously

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

How do so-called Religious/Christian people really think homosexuality is even a sin? That would be nonsense. In fact, LGBT people need love instead of contempt/hatred. The word Homosexual didn't appear until the 1850s.

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

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I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

What are your thoughts about Hulk Hogan at the Republican National Convention in support of Trump and ripping his shirt off? Did he exaggerate?

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

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I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

What transforms the philosophical intellect?

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I have a reading level above third grade

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authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

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I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t cotton to rapists

I understand how hurricane paths work

'Cosmic miracle!' James Webb Space Telescope discovers the earliest galaxy ever seen - Yahoo

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I see through liars

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I can read

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I actually pay taxes

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y